health – Trueish Things

I had an experience today that flooded me with an obvious metaphor, one that’s important and that I needed to hear.

Like all of us, life has thrown some challenges my way of late. Like all of us, I’m working through some things. Life is both beautiful and challenging, almost all of the time, and I’m guessing you can relate. Right now, one challenge involves having anxiety disproportionate to the reality of the situation. I think it’s at least partially because I haven’t fully worked through some past traumatic experiences, or didn’t address them at the time. And partially because I’ve gotten away from using the “in the moment” techniques that I know work. So, when a similar situation presents itself again, as it will, it adds a layer to the (fill in the blank) anxiety, pain, illness, and may be even stronger than it was the first time.

Cue the metaphor: Today, I was in the middle of a strength workout at home, moved a weight to the side, and knocked over my coffee onto the light-colored carpet. (Yes, if it’s morning, I’ve got coffee with me no matter what I’m doing.) I paused the workout, grabbed a towel to clean up, and was surprised at how easily it came up, because I had gotten to it right away. It almost disappeared. Yay! Talking to myself, I said out loud (and, yeah, pardon the grammar), “Cleans up easy when you do it quick“!

The message was so obvious, it almost took my breath away. If you deal with your metaphorical messes quickly, no matter how big or small (trauma, health issues, finances, even life’s “to-dos”) they will be much easier to manage than if you leave them to soak into the carpet, dry up, and leave a permanent stain. It seems so obvious. There might be a small or imperceptible stain left, but much better than the alternative. I’ve always been a fan of preventative medicine and addressing issues quickly, but I’m not so sure I’ve followed my own advice very well. (I’m a nurse, shocker. Apologies to my fellow nurses if you operate differently)

Experience a challenging time? Feel the emotions, process them, and build resilience. Seek counseling support if you need it. Fantastic. Find a questionable spot on your skin? Go get it treated before it worsens into full-blown skin cancer. The house is getting messy? Pick it up and clean it up before it looks like an episode of Hoarders. Gain a couple of pounds? Dig in and focus on your health before you’ve gained 30. The examples could go on; you get the idea.

So, what to do from here?

For me, the answer is to tune in and take action in the moment. Feel that anxiety? Acknowledge it, take a deep breath, realize you’re safe, and focus on what’s true and what areas you have control over. Gained those couple of pounds or gained some credit card debt? Appreciate the current situation, then move towards what’s true and what we can do about it right now. Maybe even focus on gratitude. What? Something wise I heard lately: You can’t be anxious and grateful at the same time. Invite gratitude for what is good, or even what life’s challenges have to teach you.

Ok great, you say, but I’ve already gained those 30 pounds, have some major (again, fill in the blank) health, mental health, financial, or life issues. Now what? It’s not so easy! You’re right, it’s not easy, but the same principles apply. It is simple, but not easy. If you think about it, all we can do is focus on the right now, what’s true, and what we have control over. Sprinkle in a dash of gratitude and you’ve got a recipe for positive change and a beautiful life.

Wishing you health, happiness, and the strength and ability to take swift action.

Oh, how glorious that sounds and feels. And simultaneously it seems indulgent.

Awhile back, I was in a yoga class and there was a beautiful moment in between poses, where the instructor said, “Do Nothing“. In that moment, I was allowed, told actually, to be still, rest. I had permission. And you know what? it felt AMAZING!

We live in a society that places value on production, money, consumption, and, busyness. We value doing more and less so ourselves as humans. And for what? It’s a sad state we’re in, really. Community and connection, self-care, rest, mindfulness, and presence, all seem like buzzwords. Don’t get me wrong, I place high value on all of these things, but when I’m being honest, my actions don’t often reflect my words. Relatable? Do I really value them? Our actions reflect our values, and that is probably a discussion for another day. Intellectually, I know all those things are critical for my physical and mental health. Intellectually, I also know that if I take care of myself, I will be a kinder mom, friend, wife, colleague, daughter, and community member. I would encourage anyone I know to place the highest value on self.

But practically speaking, in my day-to-day, I ensure I get it all done before I consider rest or self-care. I don’t treat myself as I would a friend. I’m on a hamster wheel of “production”. How sad. Being honest and vulnerable here: “do nothing” sometimes gives me anxiety because I am always supposed to be producing and doing something!

As a nurse and curious human, here’s what I know: Chronic stress can negatively effect the body: reduced immune function, increased inflammation, weight gain, negative cardiovascular effects, poor gut health, increased risk for cancer…The list goes on.

Ok enough with the negativity, let’s shift this. I ask myself, I ask you. How often do you “do nothing” , tune in, or feel what you really need? There is such incredible value in slowing down, being still, sitting with our thoughts, or even better NOT thinking, to the extent that is possible. How can we incorporate this into our lives more often? If you’re like me, you might think “well I won’t get it all done” then! No way, can’t do it! I encourage you to do a quick google search on the value of “doing nothing”. I think you’ll receive some enlightening information. Interestingly, there are so many benefits of “doing nothing”: Improved mood, productivity (ironically?), creativity, problem-solving, and much more.

Here are some simple, practical strategies for reducing that chronic stress, increasing self-love (notice I didn’t say self-care, as that can also feel like another item on the to-do list), and doing nothing. I certainly don’t have it all figured out, but I’m actively working on these things: (I realize that providing a list of things to do probably doesn’t feel like “doing nothing”, but stick with me)

Morning: Set the tone for the day. Reflect and consider how to slow down before you ever turn on a computer, touch a phone, or brush your teeth. Before you get out of bed, practice gratitude and set a positive intention for the day. . Breathe: It can be as simple as in and out through the nose, boxed breathing, or more advanced yogic techniques (breath of fire, etc.). Walk: Put the tech away and step outside for even 10 or 15 minutes. Feel fresh air on your face, look around and pay attention (no really, actually) to the sights, sounds and smells around you. Sit: Got a meditation practice? Even 5 minutes a day has benefits. Connect: Maybe the most important? Again, put the tech away (no really, actually) and enjoy a meal or conversation. Do nothing. Just talk, and be together.

I hope that we can all incorporate even just one of these things every day. I am actively working on it, and I look forward to the experiment.

Much love, and enjoy doing nothing!

Resources:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5137920/

https://www.columbiadoctors.org/news/chronic-stress-can-hurt-your-overall-health#:~:text=Research%20shows%20that%20chronic%20stress,high%20blood%20pressure%2C%20and%20stroke.

https://intheknow.insead.edu/article/benefits-doing-nothing#:~:text=Your%20resting%20state%20is%20a,more%20imaginative%20thoughts%20and%20ideas.

https://www.henryford.com/blog/2022/12/6-health-benefits-of-taking-time-to-do-nothing#:~:text=Benefits%20Of%20Doing%20Nothing&text=Aiding%20problem%2Dsolving%3A%20Breaks%20improve,think%20of%20an%20innovative%20idea.